Merry Christmas in Times of Sadness

The last two days have been very difficult. I had four of my patients to die; 3 yesterday and 1 this morning. At this time of the year when we are wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, how do you keep the holiday spirit as you tell families that their loved one has died? The patient I pronounced this morning I had become very close to her. As I drove to her house, I cried. As I expressed my condolences to her daughter, I cried. While we waited for the funeral home, we talked about the good times she had in the last year. Every week when I would visit her. I'd ask Ms. J what are going to do today. She would respond "I'm going to go fishing." Ms. J loved to go catfishing and her daughter took her every chance she could. One day I asked her, got the same response and her daughter stated "Not today mom it's raining." I looked at Ms. J and said "We need to talk to the man upstairs and get him to turn off the water." We had a great laugh. At my last visit Ms. J was looking forward to going fishing before winter set in . I told her daughter when I left this morning, she is now catching the biggest and best catfish around and enjoying every minute. I can see her sitting on the docks of heaven fishing with Jesus at her side in her fully healed, glorious body. As I left her home, I rejoiced as I listened to the Christmas music on the local Christian radio station. I only heard 2 words of one song "unspeakable joy". That is what I realized I had as I minister to my patients at this time of year that is to be merry. As I express my condolences to my families, I have in my heart "unspeakable joy". I pray that this joy shines through when I am with my patients and their families. An hour later, I was summoned to another patient's home. It sounded like she would take her last breath before I arrived or soon after. Thankfully it was just a little crisis. As I discussed different options and explained the disease process to my patient and her family, co-workers of hers arrived. She perked up with the biggest smile. She didn't even look like someone who could die at any moment. So that she could enjoy her company, I took my leave. She hugged me and wished me a Merry Christmas. The joy that filled my heart as I realized that even in a time of sadness wishing someone a Merry Christmas could be appropriate and appreciated.

As we celebrate the miracle of the Virgin Birth, in the midst of sadness, may you have a Merry Christmas. Know that Jesus Christ who came to earth that we may have eternal life, gives us "unspeakable joy" and a Merry Christmas, just as Ms. J is celebrating the best Christmas ever. My prayer is that if you do not know Jesus as your Lord and Savior please seek Him. Because with Him it is possible to "Have a Merry Christmas in times of sadness."

How do I Pray for Healing?

This week I have 2 dear friends facing medical crisis with a parent. The first, Mary, her mom was found unconscious and went into a coma. After about a week Mary and her family needed to make the decision to take her off the ventilator and let her go to her eternal home. The second, Elaine, her dad under went colon surgery to remove more cancer. The day after surgery he was fine, up and walked in the room and was even doing his breathing exercises. The next morning Elaine and her family receives a call that her dad was critical, going to ICU and being put on a ventilator. My heart grieves from afar for my dear friends and I wish I could be with them to provide comfort.

So how do I pray for healing? I know there are two types of healing, healing back to life and healing to our eternal home. For Mary, my prayers have been for our Merciful God to take her mom home quickly when the ventilator is removed and that she has no suffering. For Elaine, my pray is that God will send an answer that to let the family know that all is going to be okay and this is just a bump in the road. I sometimes feel guilty praying for one's healing to be death and the other to be life. I feel I am cheating my friend of her mother. I also feel an overwhelming sense of peace that both of my prayers are the right ones. Both of my friends are friends of each other too. So do I talk about Elaine's dad stabilizing and getting better to Mary, knowing that her mom is dying? This is where I feel life is unfair! This is also where I get on my knees and pray that God speaks through me and I don't. I had a long talk last night with Mary. I pray that my words were of comfort.

I know for Elaine's dad my prayer for healing to life is right, that if at any point God says not this time, my prayer was answered. It may not have been the answer I wanted or Elaine wanted, but it was the answer God gave us. I also know that God is sovereign and will see us through this difficult time no matter how He answers our prayers of healing.